I Accidentally Moved My Children Next To A Nude Beach
Dear friends,
Happy fall everyone. Hard to believe September is already here. We’ve been living in Miami for over a month and finally starting to settle in.
Our super duper fancy building. I have to tell you, we have moved into the most luxurious building I can ever imagine. We did it by accident, but I’m not complaining. Seriously, I feel like I’m living on the Crystal Symphony (my favorite luxury cruise ship). You look outside and all you see is ocean (just like on the ship), when you’re sitting on the beach, young stud-ly men bring you iced towels to cool down, there’s even a chauffeured limo for use by residents whenever they want. Any time they call meetings of building residents, they call it for 4:00 p.m. because nobody who lives here works, except for us. Recently they held a complaint meeting at 4:00 where you were only allowed to complain - you couldn’t say anything nice - so I went just to see what people could possibly complain about living in such palatial quarters. It was awful. All the staff who were being complained about were there. I raised my hand and said, “this is the nicest place I’ve ever lived; everything’s perfect!” The head of the board told me to sit down and keep my mouth shut if I didn’t have anything mean to say. 
I don’t get it. That must be some kind of bizarre native Miami fancy-building custom. Anyway, my family prides itself on being the Beverly Hillbillies of Turnberry Ocean Colony.
I moved my children next to a nude beach!
So imagine my surprise when I took a walk on the beach recently and realized that starting two buildings down from us, there is a nude beach. I had to walk by it several times just to check it out and make sure it really was all nude, all the time - and it was! Turns out, this is the gay and old people nude beach. The beach for young heterosexuals is in South Beach. When I told Sam we were living near a nude beach, he lit up like a Christmas tree. It was the happiest I’d seen him since we moved here. Then I told him who frequented the beach and his face dropped. “Sorry Sam,” I had to tell him, “no perky young breasts , only long saggy grandmother ones.” Don’t tell anyone but that’s where I spend all my time when he’s at school. Kidding!
Gilding Lily. Meanwhile, I have two exciting plugs for friends to tell you about. First of all, my dear friend, Tatiana Boncompagni, has just published her first book - Gilding Lily. Tatiana is a young mother, married to a guy named Hoover, as in Hoover vacuum cleaners, and is a socialite herself (albeit a very nice, down to earth one). She writes for the Style Section of the Times, Vogue, and other la di da publications. The book is about a young mother married to an heir to a major fortune who writes for the Style section of a paper like the Times (Tatiana has no imagination, I tell you). When she starts writing about socialites in her own circle, she gets into big trouble. So, the book is life inspired (except for the part where the protagonist gets into big trouble. That hasn’t happened to Tatiana - not yet). I actually wrote a blurb for the book that was supposed to go on the front cover, but then she got a blurb from Plum Sykes, so she relegated me to the back. Don’t worry, I still love you, Tatiana. Anyway, if you’d like to buy a copy and support Tatiana who is schlepping around the company promoting the book right now, just click here to go to Amazon.com and here to go to Barnesandnoble.com to order your copy.
SouthnFrance Bon Bons. Here’s my second plug [hey, if you had something for me to plug, I'd plug that too. I'm an equal opportunity plugger]: You’ve heard me talk about my friend Charlene who started a small bon bon factory in Wilmington, NC called SouthnFrance. That’s Charlene there next to two 50 pound coconut bon bons. Anyway, if you haven’t heard me talk about her, I always tell people to buy their bon bons for Christmas gifts because they are so reasonably priced and delicious - especially the coconut ones. They’re my personal favorites. Anyway, they are entered in a small business contest in the “yummiest” category. If they win, they will find themselves at the center of a media storm that includes recognition on national and local TV, radio, in newspapers and magazines, and on some of the largest, most influential websites on the web, MSN and StartupNation.com among them. That would be HUGE for Charlene who has worked her tushy off to build this business and deserves the recognition. I don’t say that lightly. Owning a small business is the toughest thing a person can do. You can vote for her (once a day!) now through October 30th. Just go to this link and vote. It’s super easy. I’m voting every day. And I’m telling you, her bon bons are to die for!!! To vote, go to:
http://www.startupnation.com/homebased100/contestant/1582/index.php
Well, that’s it for now. I’d best go get dressed because my adorable husband is taking me out to dinner tonight. We don’t know anyone else in Miami (except for two other people) so we’re kind of stuck with each other most of the time. Good thing we enjoy each other’s company.
Hugs,
Karen