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April 18, 2008

Hi everyone,

Let me get the super important stuff out of the way:

Please get your calendars now and ink in the date. If you’re going to be in New York or Denver in June, come see me read from Holly Would Dream. American Idol won’t be on that night. I made sure of it.

New York - June 5
Barnes and Noble - 6th Avenue at 8th Street - 7:30 p.m.

Denver - June 17
Tattered Cover - Colfax Avenue - 7:00 p.m.

If you’d like, you can pre-order the book right now from Amazon.com or Barnesandnoble.com. Feel free to order several. They’re really cheap and make the great gifts. Don’t worry, we’ll wait for you.

Now that my soft-sell is over, welcome to my nightmare. I am writing to you from the Delta skipper plane terminal in Orlando. We are in the midst of a deluge of biblical proportion. An enormous black cloud has settled over the airport, sending down crackling lightening bolts and loud thunder booms. My flight has been delayed indefinitely. Apparently the plane I’m to take is circling because it’s too dangerous to land. It’s one of those baby jets that I always swear I will never fly in bad weather. And yet, here I am waiting.

Sitting next to me is the pilot who is supposed to fly my plane. Captain Tickle is his name (according to his badge). Captain Tickle is fast asleep and snoring lightly. Am I worried? You bet I am.

Mark and I just spent a week in Orlando. It was a work boondoggle where I got to come along as “the wife.” You’ll never guess what I discovered on my visit. There’s a brand new activity in Orlando, one that is giving the theme parks a real run for their money. What is it, you ask? Foreclosure bus tours! That’s right. In a wacky pink bus (because pink spells fun), they drive you past homes that last sold for a half a million bucks that can be yours for…well, no offer is too small! A bank officer sits at the front of the bus providing commentary about each home. You can even put them on your American Express cards, which have no spending limit. If you ever wanted to live near Disneyworld, now’s your chance.

Okay, now Captain Tickle is drooling (just a little spittle, but still). What do I do? I do not know the etiquette here.

But I digress. We discovered a wonderful bar in Orlando called Vines. It’s in a strip mall near a restaurant called Jeffrey’s (in case you want to go there). When we first walked in, it looked as if Sunset Manor had dropped off its house band. The average age of the musicians was eighty. The bass player wore those thick glasses you have to wear when you have cataracts, the singer/tambourine player was riding an electric wheelchair, and another player fell asleep during a drum solo (not his). Bernie Lee, the vocalist, is pictured above. Despite their advanced years, these guys were fabulous musicians, even the catatonic drummer. The wheelchair guy was brilliantly channeling Louis Armstrong. I’m totally going to write them into in my next book. Apparently, this is the house band so if you come to Orlando, check it out along with one of those foreclosure bus tours. But I suggest you see the band sooner rather than later.

My airplane has just pulled into the gate. Yikes! You should see the black clouds. I’m not sure this is safe. I would discuss my concerns with Captain Tickle, only he’s making those sleep apnea snorts right now. He just woke up. He seems upset, confused. I have to confess that I am not confident about putting my life in the hands of Captain Tickle. If you are reading this newsletter, you will know I survived. Thanks be to God! (as Sonja, my old Russian manicurist/bikini groomer, used to say before she burned down the health club where she worked by leaving the wax on overnight).

Oh guess what? I attended my first writing class ever last weekend. It was Robert McKee’s Story conference. You might know him from the movie Adaptation. Ronnie Cox portrayed him in that film. The guy is a crusty old professor type with gray caterpillar eyebrows that cast long shadows on face. The class was quite intense - three twelve-hour days of story structure. Hopefully my stories will feel more structured to you in the future. At least he amused us with little ditties like, “I’m using a lot of profanity because I like to. If you don’t like it, there’s the fucking door.”

Epilogue: I did make it out of Orlando. Flying in that skipper plane was like being tossed around in a tiny raft in the North Sea. I was very relieved to land when, about an hour later, that same deluge from Orlando let loose from the Miami sky. Now I’m back in New York.

This week, my mother and mother-in-law came in to see Schuyler play Kim in Bye Bye Birdie. She was fantabulous in the role! We took the subway to the performance. At 14th Street, I told the grandmothers that we were changing to the express line. So, when the train stopped, we rushed out, but when I looked around, only my mother was on the platform. My mother-in-law was still in the local car and the door was closing. Her eyes were like saucers and she pounded on the glass in desperation (I’m exaggerating a bit but only because I know she’s reading this). Mom and I mouthed the station where we wanted her to get off right before the subway whisked her away. I felt awful! What do you tell your husband after you lose his mother in the NYC subway system? He would have been really mad, let me tell you! Thanks be to God, she got off at the right stop and we were happily reunited. But it was a close call.

Okay friends, don’t forget, if you haven’t already, get out your calendars now and INK in the date. If you’re going to be in New York or Denver in June, please come see me read from Holly Would Dream. It’ll be so much fun!

New York - June 5
Barnes and Noble - 6th Avenue at 8th Street - 7:30 p.m.

Denver - June 17
Tattered Cover - Colfax Avenue - 7:00 p.m.

I promise not to curse like Robert McKee, nor will I not drool like Captain Tickle. I will, however, make you laugh. I really, really, really hope you’ll come (I only use three reallys when I really, really, really mean it).

Love,

Karen (plus my cats, Smokey and Cookie. I thought you’d enjoy seeing them)

February 16, 2008

Hello Darlings,

Did you miss me? I missed you. All I can say is thank you Lard Jeezus (!!!) for ending the Writer’s Strike so I can send my newsletters out again. As you know, I had to go into reruns with my Holiday letter and I went dark until a settlement was reached. No, I’m not in the Union, but my adorable and talented screenwriters for The Ivy Chronicles are and you know me, I’m nothing if not supportive. I hope Jim and Stan appreciate my sacrifice and send me a thank you text message or better yet, citrus scented bath products (I love those).

Since we last connected, Christmas has come and gone. We took another cruise, this one to the Caribbean. It was on the Emerald Princess, which holds 3,000 people, the subway of cruise ships. Yes, if you must know, this was a continuation the vital research I was compelled to do for Holly Would Dream. You can’t be too careful with details in fiction. My public demands authenticity in their beach reads. I believe my next book will be set in a private villa in the South of France with many servants to do my (I mean, my character’s) bidding .

Last weekend, I made a fascinating discovery at The Golden Door Spa where Mark took me for a getaway (yes, it is hard being me). Backstory: I am a girl who does not eat her vegetables. Seriously it is rare that a green food passes my lips. Perhaps this accounts for my shortness of stature, I don’t know. It’s either that or all the coffee I drank as a toddler. Now brown foods I love (steak, chocolate, potatoes, bread - yummy!). But I digress. Not long ago I was visiting my thin friend and talented writer (Guilding Lily), Tatiana, who was on a juice fast. She offered me a sip of some green looking sludge (Pureed algae perhaps?), and I politely declined. But after my massage last week at the Golden Door, they gave me a glass of this moss green slimy looking shit, I mean juice. I decided to be brave and taste it (because everyone else in the relaxation room was drinking theirs) and guess what? It was delicious! Who knew that they hide the taste of the vegetables with fruit juice!

As soon as I returned home, I went to Whole Foods and bought three brands of green juice for a comparison test. I figured, if I could get something healthy into me without having to taste icky spinach or yucky broccoli, it would be an absolute coup. Here are my results: The best tasting (no hint of vegetable at all) was Odwalla Superfood; a close second was Bolthouse Farms Green Goodness; Naked Green Machine was third and I warn you, there is a spinachy aftertaste (echh echh). So if you’re like me and you don’t eat your vegetables, this is a good way to sneak them in your diet. I was so inspired after this discovery that I went out and bought Jessica Seinfeld’s book Deceptively Delicious which is all about hiding vegetables in your foods to get your children (or in my case, me) to eat them. I am going to try some of the recipes this week so I’ll report back.

Here’s a quick family update because my holiday letter was a rerun of letters past. Schuyler continues to soar. She got the lead in her school play, Bye Bye Birdie (the Ann Margaret role). I’m so proud of her for that. Yesterday, she jetted off to a posh resort in Mexico with her friend, Rachel, for winter break (In my next life, remind me to come back as one of my children). Sam continues to stay in his room most of the time, except when he quietly slips out to hang with his posse. He makes good grades, bathes, and changes his underwear every other day so I can’t complain. Mark is ecstatic that the indoor track season has started. It doesn’t take much to make him happy - a track meet, a jazz show, the love of a good woman (moi!).

Me, I’m just writing away and continuing my studies at Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts. Currently, I’m working toward my PH.d in Pleasure. Really, I am. It’s so much more fun than studying for those silly business or law degrees I got in my youth.

Well, that’s it for now. Hope you are having a great Winter and sticking to that diet you resolved to go on after the New Year. I know I’m not.

Hugs,

Karen

P.S. I’m so excited about Holly Would Dream, which comes out in June. One of the fun things about the book is that has over 125 hidden references to my favorite Audrey Hepburn and Cary Grant movies. If you want to be REALLY prepared to read the book and spot the references, watch these films between now and June: An Affair to Remember, Roman Holiday, Sabrina, Charade, To Catch a Thief, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, That Touch of Mink, Funny Face, My Fair Lady, How to Steal a Million. These are all great movies that I promise you’ll love.

November 24, 2007

To my dear friends,

In deference to the writer’s guild strike, I have decided not to write any new material for our 2007 Holiday letter (except for this explanatory paragraph and a few comments here and there that I can’t resist). That’s right, this year’s letter is a rerun. For those of you who have been receiving my annual missive, happy holidays to you and now feel free to delete this because you’ve already read it.

(from 2006) I blew it. I decided to forgo our family holiday letter on the assumption that no one would miss it. BIG MISTAKE! We received so many concerned letters, calls and emails from friends and loved ones wanting to know WHAT HAPPENED that I immediately began working on an emergency post-New Year’s letter. Okay, I’m exaggerating. Only one person e-mailed (Ken Gomez). But I’m sure the rest of you would have if I’d waited a few more days.

Have you noticed that now that I’m a professional writer, my writing has taken on a literary quality? No? Me neither.

(from 1995) After spending ten years in NY, I can now tell you with complete assurance that the real estate market has reached an all-time peak and that the smart money is selling everything it has. How do I know? Very simple. We just purchased a lovely three bedroom apartment on Union Square. People with more conventional views have suggested that $400 a square foot is too much, but I prefer to think of it as reasonable - compared to the Champs Elysee. [note from future Karen to past Karen - BUY MORE YOU IDIOT!!!]

(from 1995) We have been working to get Schuyler into kindergarten next year and this has been a major undertaking. Between essay questions, tours, parent interviews, child interviews, tests…getting Schuyler into school has become a part-time job. Manhattan schools are excellent but the process to get in is daunting. During one of her upcoming interviews, she will be expected to write her name, know the alphabet, draw shapes on demand…skills she barely possesses at four. We were so depressed that Schuyler seemed hopelessly behind on her kindergarten admissions skills that we discussed hiring an admissions consultant and getting her a tutor to help her cram for her test. Ha ha, can you imagine anything so crazy? Actually, we weren’t serious, but that tutor idea sounds like a winner - a Stanley Kaplan to prep kids for kindergarten admissions tests in NYC! [Little did I know when I wrote this that in 2001 I would be the queen of the admissions consultants and tutoring little test-takers until one wiseacre admonished me with, "Stop! Can't you see I'm only 4!]

(from 1997) We volunteered to take the guinea pig (”Star”) from Schuyler’s school for the Thanksgiving weekend. Schuyler was so excited. First she put Star in her doll house, then she gave him a tour of the apartment and introduced him to her fish, Beverly, Goldie and Sasha, then she decided to dress Star in Barbie clothes and take him out. Unfortunately, the Barbie clothes didn’t fit so she made Star a sari and took him for a ride her her doll’s baby carriage. As Schuyler and Star were watching TV later, we noticed that Star wasn’t moving much so we put him back in his cage. Next time we checked, Star was dead. Two hours after bringing him home, Schuyler had (without malice aforethought) tortured the class pet to death. I called the school and told the director exactly what happened (well, sort of) and she asked me to keep his body in the refrigerator so the kids at school could say goodbye on Monday. When Mark opened the fridge and saw a dead guinea pig in a zip-lock bag next to the turkey, he made me return Star to school to their refrigerator. The next week, the children said goodbye to Star’s body and buried him. It was traumatic for all, but we decided not to tell Schuyler that it had been her fault. The school is now looking for someone to watch the class lizard over the Christmas holiday. Schuyler volunteered, but I think not. [note - you might recognize this story. I used it in The Ivy Chronicles.]

(from 1997) Sam, age 5, is growing up to be a rough and tough boy. He still loves Super-heroes and Goosebumps books. He is full of energy and acts very tough, but tells me “I love you” whenever I leave his sight, and still sleeps with his special matted up “Red Puppy.” At night, after I hug and kiss Sam goodnight, he always says to me, “Don’t forget about Red Puppy.” Then he spreads Red Puppy’s top paws so the dog can hug me, and makes Red Puppy kiss me with his cloth tongue. [Now that Sam is 15 and sequestered in his room most of the time, I really do miss my little man of yesteryear. Funny thing though, Sam still sleeps with Red Puppy.]

(from 2000) Schuyler, age 9, is turning into a real beauty. She is tall and slim with blond hair and blue eyes. This year, she went to camp Arrowhead in Texas (again) and had a wonderful time. She was elected “best cabin mate” by her friends, an honor I never achieved when I attended that camp. Besides enjoying gymnastics, shopping, and visiting pet stores, Schuyler is learning to play guitar. She is also the only Quinn in Hebrew school. [note - she eventually flunked out.]

(from 2004) Schuyler, age 13, was back at French Woods this summer, a performing arts camp in the Catskills - heaven on earth as far as she is concerned. I call the place Hickey Woods. Can you guess why? Hint - it is co-ed.

(from 2000) Sam is going to try out to be in a movie on Monday. He’s auditioning to play Julianna Moore’s son and he is so excited at the prospect of becoming a rich and famous movie star. This morning at breakfast, Schuyler said to him, “Sam, if they are looking for a skinny boy, you probably won’t get the part. But if they are looking for a chubby boy, you’ll probably get it because you are the cutest chubby boy in the world!” Sam beamed and replied, “Do you really think so!!” [note - he didn't get the part. They cast a some skinny little brat.]

(from 1997) Yesterday, Sam was joyfully singing “We Wish You A Merry Christmas” on the bus when an angry passenger told him to stop. Sam looked at him and quipped, “Who are you? Ebenezer Scrooge?” The others on the bus applauded his five-year-old wit.

(from 1996) This season, I took the kids to see Peter Pan on Broadway. There is a moment in the show when Hook declares, “I am the greatest villain in all the WORLD!!” When that happened, Sam jumped out of his chair, punched his fist in the air, and screamed, “That’s what YOU think, Hook!” I had to hold him back or he would have stormed the stage and taken Hook down all by himself. The entire audience was in hysterics (even Hook broke character and laughed).

(from some time in the 1990’s) Mark and I are fine. We both turned 40 this year. We feel SO old. [note from future Karen to past Karen - Slap! Slap! Slap!]

(from 2001) This year, we lost our beloved cat, Kitty Quinn, who thought he could fly, but found out the hard way that he couldn’t. [note - After Kitty died, the custodian in our building wrapped his body in a black hefty bag and threw him in the trash - we weren't able to find the body despite some serious digging. Mark was traveling and I told him over the phone that Kitty had died. He thought I said "Mimi died." Mimi was my 95 year old grandmother who was in a nursing home in Texas.
Mark said, "That's not so unexpected. What happened."
I told him, "She jumped out the window."
"What," Mark said, "So it was suicide."
"You could say that," I said.
"When is the funeral?" Mark asked.
"That's the terrible part," I said, "there won't be a funeral. They wrapped her body in a hefty bag and threw it in the trash."
We then realized that we were not talking about the same loved one.

(from 2000) Mark is still at Royal Alliance, as their general counsel, a job he enjoys. He follows jazz religiously and track and field with great passion. [I use this line every year.]

(from 2000) Guess what! I just lost 25 pounds. I’m proud to report that today, I bought a new pair of jeans, size 4. [Those jeans have not fit me in six years.]

(from 2003) I’m going to end this holiday letter with Sam’s life story (misspellings and all) which he gave me for my birthday in 2003. There is nothing I could write that would top Sam’s heartfelt autobiography at age 11. Enjoy!

My Life Story, by Sam Quinn

It all started the day I was born. My parents saw a yellow kid. I had to sit under a light for three whole days with no break. What a drag.

When I was 18 months old my mom and dad sent me to preschool. I hated it. But I made some great friends including one of my best ones, Spencer Mossack.

Preschool was getting boring so when I was 5 my parents sent me to regular school. In kindergarten I had Jane and Judy as my teachers. Life was going along fine until one day in early January. I found out my grampa had cancer. I wasn’t sure what cancer was but I knew it was bad. He died the next month.

In first grade my life took a turn for the better. In early September, two days before school started, a cat showed up at our building. We took him in and named him Kitty.

In first grade I had John and Tracy as my teachers. They were nice. I got homework for the first time. In April my best friend Spencer’s dad died of a heart attack.

In second grade, I had Jessica as my teacher. She was nice and strict. If you forgot homework, she made you redo it. For the first time in my life, I had a year without any deaths. It won’t last.

When I finished second grade, I felt like I had accomplished something. I had a hard year, but it paid off. The best part of the year was little league. My team (the Reds) won the championship. I haven’t won it since.

Third grade was horrible. On September 11, the twin towers fell. One week later, Kitty died. Mom understood my pain and let me take a day off school. She understood that Kitty was like a part of me and when I lost that part, I broke down piece by piece. It took a whole year to recover. Jessica was my teacher again and I thought I deserved to be in a 3-4 class instead of a 2-3 class do to my smartness. All in all, it was lounging around.

When I started fifth grade I was shocked to find out I was in 5H. Heather is a mean old witch. I’d rather have Josh like Schuyler. It’s been hard and fun.

My life is like a ferris wheel. It goes up and down frequently. Thanks mom. Without you I wouldn’t be here. You were my inspiration. So, I wrap it up by saying “Thanks, Mom.”

Happy holidays to all. Next year, I promise to write an original letter if GOD WILLING the writers have gone back to work.

Love, Karen

P.S. For those of you who are looking for a delicious and reasonably priced gift to send to your friends this season, try the bon bons from Southnfrance.com. They are homemade and the most delicious chocolates you can sink your teeth into. In fact, if you’re on my list (and you know who you are), you’ll get some from me this year, you lucky, lucky person you.

P.P.S. If you are looking for a more dramatic gift, check out sonnysjewelry.com, my favorite bauble store in all the WORLD!!! Okay, so my family owns the business, but I’d shop there anyway because they pick the most beautiful and unusual items and they price them very reasonably. Take a look. I always get complements on anything I buy at Sonny’s.

P.P.P.S. Don’t forget that Wife in the Fast Lane or The Ivy Chronicles also make lovely gifts this holiday season for any of your friends who haven’t read them yet. You can get them on-line at amazon.com or barnesandnoble.com.

Hey everyone!
I decided I must send out a quick newsletter because a friend told me she was hurt that I’d dropped her from my list and wondered how to get back on. That’s when you know it’s been too long since we connected.

BIG PIECE OF MOVIE NEWS!!!
An offer was made to turn Wife in the Fast Lane into a movie! Whoo Hoo, it’s true. I’m very excited about it. Now, it’s not all signed sealed and delivered yet, but it’s definitely in the works. Growing up Jewish, we were taught never to talk about good news until it’s all happened (lest you put a curse on the event), the classic example being we aren’t supposed to decorate our baby’s rooms until after the child is born. But as a student of Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts, I have seen firsthand how talking about your desires actually helps manifest them, so I am blabbing to you now. Anyway, I’ll keep you posted as to when you should look for your red carpet outfits, which I am sure will be in the not too distant future. Well, scratch that. Another thing I have seen firsthand is that it takes a long time for a movie to be made, but they do get made. I recently read the script for The Ivy Chronicles and I love, love, love it. You will too.

My Whirlwind Travels
Let’s see, when last we spoke, I had just turned in my new book, Holly Would Dream, after undertaking a back-breaking, research trip through Europe to be sure I’d gotten all the details right. The trip took me to Rome and then on a cruise on the Silver Whisper around the Italian Riviera. It was rough, but it had to be done. Many people think it’s easy being a writer, but the demands are endless, let me tell you.

On my return, I immediately packed for my annual trip to Canyon Ranch in Tucson, Arizona with Mom. You probably think I’m some sort of jet setter. Well, I’m not. Mom and I go every year as you might remember (I always write about it). But this year was extra special. You see, the prize for my Wife in the Fast Lane one-liner contest was a $2,000 gift certificate to Canyon Ranch. Elizabeth Blair, the winner, met me and Mom there. She brought her mother, Rita, along. We had lunch and so much fun visiting. I really wanted to show you a photo of the three of us together, which we took right before I stuck my hand into a cactus and had to be rushed to medical, but it’s not in a format that I can use to upload here so you’ll have to imagine. Beth is tall, with dark hair, stylish glasses and wide Julia Roberts smile. Her mom, Rita, is an adorable blond who just lost 65-pounds. Can you believe that? I still can’t get over such an amazing accomplishment. Anyway, they had a wonderful time together at the Ranch and I was so excited to finally meet Beth.

Me, Whining about Aging
One of the downsides of going to Canyon Ranch is that besides going to Medical to get cactus thorns pulled out of my hand, I go to Medical for blood work and other diagnostic tests. It always leaves me so Joni Mitchell blue. This year, I learned that my osteopenia had gotten worse so strength bearing exercises aren’t just recommended, they’re a must. I suppose it’s the universe’s way to get me to exercise and not just lament the fact that I have no time to do it. Sigh.

Aging has become a part time job. Can you relate to that? Seriously, I used to have one doctor in my Rolodex. Now I have eight in my Palm. There was a day when I used to laugh at Sally Field and her once a month Boniva commercial. Puh-leaze! I thought. Now that I’m taking the drug, I really do see the benefits of a once a month dose! It’s easy as 1-2-3. OMG, did I just say that? Last week I had to have a colonoscopy. Thankfully, I will spare you the details. The workouts take an hour a day, the fluffing up of the hair and skin - don’t get me started. Mark says I should let my hair go gray, but I think not. And do you know how much more effort it takes to eat right versus eating wrong? A lot!!! And choosing vitamins to take is so confusing.

Conversation with Mark last night:

Mark: Do you remember the name of city where the Ritz Carleton on the west coast of Florida is?
Me: No, I can’t remember it. But doesn’t what’s her name live near there?
Mark: Who?
Me: You know, what’s her name with the blond hair.
Mark: Oh, you mean the one who works at that law firm. What’s the name of the firm?
Me: Isn’t that the firm you used for that case?
Mark: Which case?
Me: You know, the case with the broker who, oh what did he do?
And so on. This is what aging is like, people!!! It isn’t pretty. It is time consuming. And it’s very confusing. Okay, now I’m spent. I think I’ll go drink one of my eight twelve-ounce glasses of water the doctor said I should drink.

The Hardest Part of Writing
I’m back. Now that Holly is turned in, I’m at that point in the writing process where I have to decide what my next book will be. I think that is the hardest point of all because it’s such a big decision. Whatever story you commit yourself to, you’ll be working on for the next two years (maybe more), so it has to be something you are absolutely in love with. Right now, I’m putting all my ideas on a pad and I’ll pick one to go with in the next few weeks.

The second hardest part of the writing process (to me). I tend to write my story until it’s done, not worrying about the quality of my first draft. That way, I know what the story will be, and I can then go back and really work on the characters, the descriptions, the plot points that don’t quite work, etc. This is the process that works for me. But the problem is, when I read my “shitty first draft” (that is actually a technical term writers use), I get scared that I’ll never be able to make it better. But then, of course, I make it better. Still, it’s a frightening time in the writing process. Why am I telling you this? Because, should you become a writer, or actually in any endeavor, it is good to understand where the scary points are so you can push through them and know that it will all work out despite your trepidations. Okay, life lesson over!

Books I Recommend
Finally, I have a wonderful book to recommend. One of my favorite books of all time was Pillars of the Earth, by Ken Follet. It was written ages ago and if you haven’t read it, you’re in for a treat. He just wrote a sequel - World Without End. I finished it last night and loved it. But beware, you won’t be able to put either book down.

On the spiritual side, I’m reading Creating Money - Keys to Abundance, by Sanaya Roman and Duane Packer. I know that title doesn’t sound spiritual, but it is. I’m finding it very inspiring.

For those of you interested in Mama Gena’s work (I know, I talk about it a lot), check out her book Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts. It’s not a substitute for the course itself, but it’ll really get you thinking about how to add more pleasure in your life and how to manifest your desires using your power as a woman. If you’re a man, this is a good book to give to the woman in your life.

As for other books, I tried to read The Manny, but couldn’t get past chapter 4 so I don’t recommend this if you’re looking for some good chic lit. My friend, Tatiana (who has a wonderful book coming out end of next summer called Gilding Lily) lent me The Infidelity Pact by Carrie Karasyov, and that was really fun. I also enjoyed Getting Rid of Matthew by Jane Fallon.

Chocolate I HIGHLY Recommend

Last but not least, for your holiday gifts, check out Southnfrance.com for the BEST chocolate bon bons you can buy. These are all made by hand with the most delicious ingredients. They have wonderful flavors like chocolate chip cookie dough, peanut buttah, coconut, and more. This is a small company owned by Pascal Siegler (from France) and Charlene Dupray (from the South - hence the name). Seriously, I am a huge chocolate lover and these bon bons are TO DIE FOR!!! Plus, they’re reasonably priced, which is a bonus, because they are so good they really should cost a lot more. Check out their website. It is a lot of fun and Charlene is a wonderful blogger.

Anyway, great to catch up with you again. Enjoy the Fall,

Hugs and Feathers,

Karen

September 4, 2007

Darlings,

ARG! Summer’s Over, But What Fun It Was!
How are you? No really, how ARE you? If I’m sounding rah-tha David Niven-ish, it’s because I’ve just returned from the Continent on a research tour Mark and I took for my new book, Holly Would Dream.

That’s right, key scenes of the book take place in Rome, at the Hassler Hotel, so of course, we had to visit the Eternal City and stay there. The media director was kind enough to show me all their Presidential Suites (which we sadly couldn’t afford at 2,000 euros/day), and I was able to hone the details of my story accordingly. As I blathered on about an earlier note to you, this book involves a fashion historian who is obsessed with Audrey Hepburn. As it turns out, Audrey stayed at the Hassler throughout the making of Roman Holiday, so I took that as a good sign.

I had written a scene where Holly and her love interest go out for dinner and dancing on a lively barge restaurant on the Tiber River (much like that scene in Roman Holiday where Audrey and Gregory Peck go, where the fight breaks out - remember?). Anyway, when I got to Rome, I realized that the Tiber is now a marsh that smells suspiciously like doody, so I moved my scene somewhere more romantic and less aromatic. I chose a place called Il Palazzetto, which is an al fresco bar above the Spanish Steps where Mark and imbibed every night of our visit. Naturally, we became the bartender’s pets and they let us stay and drink with the staff and their friends even after they closed. This happens to us wherever we travel thanks to Mark and his legendary after-hours charm.

Other important scenes take place on an ultra-luxurious ship called the Tiffany Star. So, again, in the name of research, Mark and I were forced to cruise on the most sumptuous of the small ships, the Silver Whisper. Sigh. I know, you feel very bad for me, that I had to work on vacation, but I am THAT committed to truth in fiction, so it was the least I could do.

The ship was absolutely wonderful and we had a blast partying, dancing, and singing karaoke. I sang back-up on a Meat Loaf song that Mark performed. We were terrible, of course. I mean, who can touch Meat Loaf when it comes to performing? No one, that’s who. We shouldn’t have even tried. Next time I’m backing up Mark doing the Bee Gees. They would have been easier.

We met the greatest people - all in the name of research, of course. With our new friends, Celia Graham (recent lead in Phantom of the Opera) and Ben Jones (movie producer and new father of adorable puppy, Norman), we toasted each other’s wishes and threw our champaign glasses off the stern of the ship at midnight - a scene I may just add to Holly. Since action takes place in Tiffany Star’s kitchen and bridge, I toured both places on the Silver Whisper. Holly also has a “thing” with the captain of the ship, but I didn’t research this personally as Mark and I were too busy celebrating our 26th wedding anniversary.

The Ivy Movie
Speaking of celebrating, Jim Berg and Stan Zimmerman, the adorable and talented screenwriters for The Ivy Chronicles, just showed me their first draft of the script. Yipee! They were generous enough to let me comment on it, which is unusual. I’m told most screenwriters stay as far away from original authors as possible. While I had a few suggestions, on the whole, it was absolutely brilliant. They did an amazing job of adapting the book, adding some hysterical scenes and really fantastic original touches. I’ve even staked out a place for me to have a little cameo at the end. I’m starting my big diet now in anticipation and I may just have to double up on my pole dancing classes.

Back to School

The kids are looking forward to going back to school. Okay, that’s a lie. I don’t know why I even wrote it.

This Month’s Recommendations

I DIG DOUG

My friend Candice just took me to the FUNNIEST off-Broadway play. It was written and is performed by Karen DiConcetto and Rochelle Zimmerman, two young women right out of college. What a debut! It’s about two NYC teenagers obsessed with pop culture who discover that the presidential election is the ultimate course in reality television. It’s a madcap crash course in politics, fashion, gun control, animal cruelty, grand theft auto, and the art of seduction. It is HYSTERICAL, so much so that I’m going back to see it again with my kids. It’s at the Bleeker St. Theater between now and September 16 - 212-691-1555.

Getting In…Kindergarten

My friend, director and producer, Pamela French, spent a year documenting three families as they rode the rollercoaster ride of the NYC kindergarten admissions process. In other words, it’s The Ivy Chronicles, only for real. Watch it Sept. 10, 7 p.m., on The Learning Channel (TLC).

When Do We Eat?

My dentist recommended this one. It is laugh out loud funny; I kid you not. It’s also very irreverent so if you’re easily offended, don’t rent it. It stars Leslie Ann Warren and Jack Klugman and it’s about a dysfunctional family’s Passover dinner. If you’re Jewish you’ll really appreciate it, but even if you’re not, you’ll still pee in your pants with laughter.

Hope you had a wonderful summer. I’m looking forward to seeing you or talking to you soon. ‘

Hugs,

Karen