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June 9, 2008

Dear Friends and Family,

I had an assistant (for a day)!
Last Thursday, I had my first reading for Holly Would Dream in New York City. Everyone was invited to come in their best little black dresses and they looked fabulous! My friend Joanne Porzio decided to be my assistant, which mainly consisted of sitting on the toilet while I put on my make up. I LOVE having an assistant! George and Scott gave me a genuine Audrey do (tiara and all), while Schuyler worked her liner magic to give me cat eyes. Another friend, Smita Paul came over to film the event, so while we were in the car Joanne and I squeezed together and had several pretend conversations for the camera. This was the first time I ever went to one of my New York City book signings by car instead of subway. I’m moving up in the world!

My Public Awaited me!
When we arrived at the bookstore (Barnes and Noble in Greenwich Village), Smita jumped out first so she could film Joanne and I exiting the limo (really a town car). Then, to my surprise, a big crowd of my friends had gathered in their little black dresses and holding signs that said, “The Karen Quinn Fan Club.” They were screaming with excitement and people on the street gathered to see what was going on. My friend, Juicy Judy, who looked amazing, acted like she was seeing the Beatles (which she kind of was, except that I’m one person and not a band – otherwise, we’re very much alike). Everyone walking by was laughing and smiling and taking pictures of us with their cell phone cameras. Let me tell you, if you can get people’s attention in Greenwich Village, you’ve arrived (they’ve seen it all). It was such a blast! I had to re-exit the car and look surprised a few extra times so we could get it on tape. I’m so happy we filmed this because now it is all a blur.

By the time I got upstairs, people were all lined up and I began to sign. I’ve never had to sign BEFORE an event started. My friend, Penny brought beautiful flowers from her own garden, so my signing space was gorgeous. I signed for forty-five minutes and then began my reading.

My reading
Donna, from Barnes and Noble, introduced me. It was so wonderful looking out on a sea of Audrey Hepburns (really, my friends dressed like her). For those of you who were there, you looked amazing and I thank you for going all out like you did. What fun! I read the prologue from the book, which is inspired by the movie, Sabrina. Then I told some of the many true stories that inspired scenes from the book. One story involved my friend, Julie Nelson, who sang opera on a yacht while sailing in Santorini. So Julie graced us with the same aria she sang on that beautiful day in Greece. People laughed; they cried. No, really, they did. They laughed at what I said and cried when Julie sang (it was that beautiful).

Truth is stranger than fiction!
For those of you who were there, do you know the story I told about the man who died on the cruise ship and his wife who continued the trip and met another man by the end? One of our friends who was at the reading came up to me after and told me that the man who died was her grandfather. I won’t say who it was, because I don’t know if she wants me to, but can you believe that? Apparently the woman was her step-grandmother and she married the guy she took up with on the ship.

There are many more photos to see!
Click here to look at ALL the photos from the reading!(http://karenquinn1.angelfire.com/karen_quinns_holly_w/)

I’m having a bit of trouble getting my photos of the reading into the newsletter (calling all word-press pros — HELP!), so I put the pictures on one of those free display sites and you can take a look at them. It was the most fun evening, as I’m sure you’ll be able to tell from the pics. I’ll be at the Tattered Cover in Denver on June 17 and Barnes and Noble in Wilmington, NC on July 10.

By the way, if you haven’t gotten your copy of Holly Would Dream yet, be sure to order a NEW copy today from Barnesandnoble.com or Amazon.com.

Note received yesterday from a random reader
“I love it.
I want to be Holly.
You’re so amazing, Karen! [note from KQ: ahem, yes, thank you it's true]
I wanna do something I love, you’re so inspiring!
But I LOVE LOVE it, having so much fun reading it.
Only complaint I have is that it’s going to fast.”

Okay, this note actually came from Stacey, my stalker. But she wouldn’t have said she loved it unless she meant it. She’s NOT that kind of stalker.

So go buy your book now if you haven’t already. Remember, the holidays are just around the corner (how often can you get such a fun gift for $11?) And be sure to look at the photos from the first reading. They are gorgeous. Thank you Nancy and Penny for taking them.

xxxoo

Karen

June 4, 2008

Dear Friends and Family,

I am beyond thrilled to tell you that Holly Would Dream is finally out! Yesterday was the release date and you can now acquire it for your very own library (along with ten additional copies for holiday gifts – they’re only about $11). Seriously, buy them now when I really need my book sales numbers to climb, I mean, when you won’t have to fight all those other aggressive Christmas shoppers and brave the icy streets. You can order the book this very second from Amazon.com or Barnesandnoble.com. Just click on those links and you’ll go right to my book page. Take your time. We’ll wait.

A Review
In case you haven’t been paying super close attention to my newsletters, Holly Would Dream is about a woman who wishes her life could be like an Audrey Hepburn romantic comedy (Sabrina, Roman Holiday, Funny Face – she’s not picky), but of course it isn’t. Until it is. My desire was to write a book that felt like one of those delicious Hollywood classics with Cary Grant and Grace Kelly dashing around the Mediterranean in a little white convertible trying to catch a thief. Here is how my friend Charlene Dupray from southnfrance.com (the best bon bons you can buy in the world) described it. By the way, if you want to forward this email to your friends and recommend Holly, that would be lovely indeed (as Audrey Hepburn might have put it).

Recipe for a delicious summer novel:

Place towel, bag, and cold beverages on a well-heated beach. Grease body generously with sunscreen; large black sunglasses optional, but recommended. Assemble the following ingredients:

* 1 young, thoroughly modern heroine completely obsessed with elegant screen legend Audrey Hepburn
* 2 evil co-workers blended with a pinch of Devil Wears Prada and a dash of Ugly Betty
* 1 fresh, saucy gay sidekick
* 1 hunk of a straight man with a large fortune, private jet, and good heart.
Mix well. Next, add:
* Several cups of witty dialogue and funny situations
* 3-5 handpicked, exotic locations
* A heaping teaspoon of sea and salt air

Top with old Hollywood glamour and lots of 1950’s film references.
Garnish with 2-3 twists of plot and a generous dollop of haute couture.

Your dish should look very much like the Holly Would Dream book cover at the top of the page!

Speaking of which, I don’t know if you saw Today Show yesterday, but that very book cover was prominently featured in the 9:34 a.m. fashion show. This adorable little girl pictured above is Phoebe, my friend Lori’s daughter, who came with us to the Today Show.

That’s right, my wonderful girlfriends from Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts and I decided to go down to the Today Show wearing our Audrey Hepburn little black dresses, sunglasses, tiaras, pearls, and gloves (no long cigarette holders in the interest of not poking anyone’s eye out in the crowd). Our desire was to have fun and be interviewed by Al Roker. Our back-up desire was to have fun and get ourselves and the book cover featured on air (which we did). One thing about Mama Gena’s students is that we never miss a chance to have a good time.

When I told my kids what we were doing, Schuyler called me a “loser” and Sam said, “Whatever you do, don’t go on national TV and say you’re my mother.” Right, like I would use my five second chance to be on national TV plugging my book to embarrass Sam by telling the world I’m his mother. If I didn’t know better, I’d say children think the world revolves around them.

Anyway, during the 9:30 fashion show, my friend “Edith” (her real name has been changed because she works for NBC and this adventure was not in keeping with her executive responsibilities) asked a man in the crowd standing behind the fashion show moderators to hold up a gigantic sign of my book, which he did. So for the whole segment, my book cover was prominently displayed in front of millions of TV viewers. If I can figure out how to post the segment on line, I’ll send you the link. It was tres fabulous. I’m hoping it has the subliminal effect of getting people to go out and buy my book without knowing why they so desperately crave it.

If you ever want to go to the Today Show to get on TV, talk to me first. I figured out a lot of tricks after yesterday’s experience. Hint: Arrive by 6 a.m., bring a baby, a large group of people in matching tee-shirts, be from Iowa or Mississippi (or say you are and fake an accent) and tell Al it’s your birthday (even if it isn’t). There’s more, so call me if you want my advice.

I have book readings coming up! Hope you can make one of them:

Thursday, June 5 (tomorrow!!!)
Barnes and Noble – 7:30 pm
6th Avenue and 8th Street
NYC

Dress like Audrey Hepburn! Prizes will be awarded.
Black dresses are fine, or even her Moon River ensemble.

Tuesday, June 17
The Tattered Cover – 7:30 pm
Colfax Avenue Store
Denver, Colorado

Thursday, July 10
Barnes and Noble – 7:00 pm
Mayfair Store
Wilmington, NC

Anyway, love you all. Please order your books today or go visit a local bookstore to buy them in person. It’s really important for authors that their books sell well in the first week, so you would be helping me a lot if you picked up your copies (remember, Christmas!!!) now. I’m not just telling you this for me, but for authors everywhere that you want to support. Also, if you read Holly Would Dream and love it (as I know you will), please tell ALL your friends about it. The best way for a book to become popular is by positive word of mouth. And you can also post your reviews on Amazon or B&N.com. These are all things you can do that help a lot. Thank you for being such loyal readers of my books.

xoxo

Karen Quinn

Hi there,

This is going to be a quickie newsletter but I just had a couple of funny things thought I’d share them with you.

So, yesterday I was in a cab going uptown and the cabdriver turned and asked me, “Who do you want to win?”

Me: Either of the Davids is fine. I like David Archuletto and David Cook. “How about you? Who do you want?

Cabdriver: I like Hillary Clinton.

Hahahahaha! Funny, right? Boy did I feel stupid. I do have one question though. What is it with David Archuletto’s tongue? Is it me or is that tongue too big for his mouth?

Then, a few moments ago, I went into this Halloween store because I was getting my Audrey Hepburn costume ready for my reading. Yes, I’m going all out and I hope you will too. This is one of those places where all the help is in costume with full makeup and multiple tattoos and piercings. I was standing at the counter and the guy ringing me up was talking to another guy who I think was hitting on him.

Counter guy: I hate this F*%$#@@# store. After this Halloween season, I’m quitting.

Guy trying to pick up counter guy: Yes, you should. Then you can do something meaningful with your life, something huge.

Counter guy: Yeah, I could work at Banana Republic or even the Gap.

Guy trying to pick up counter guy: Right on, man. Hey, do you know what I want to see really bad?

Counter guy: What?

Guy trying to pick up counter guy: Blue money. Why doesn’t the government make blue money?

Counter guy: F*%$#@@#ing government. You know who they should put on the dollar? Hillary Clinton. That would be cool.

Guy trying to pick up counter guy: Yeah, you know if she wins, she’d be the first woman president, I think. I mean, she would, right? Was there another one?

Counter guy: I don’t think so. Not in my lifetime.

Okay, that’s it. Hope these conversations gave you a chuckle. They did me, especially the conversation between dumb and dumber. If I’ve offended you by making fun of dumb people, please forgive me. I’d rather not hear from the dumb friends league on this one.

Oh, one more thing, as long as you’ve read this far…don’t forget that Holly Would Dream comes out in fifteen days on June 3, 2008. You might want to mark that in your calendar.

And remember, if you’re going to be in New York or Denver in June, come see me read from Holly Would Dream. American Idol and Dancing with the Stars will be over and you’ll be looking for something fun to do. Be sure to wear your favorite little black dress.

New York – June 5
Barnes and Noble – 6th Avenue at 8th Street – 7:30 p.m.

Denver – June 17
Tattered Cover – Colfax Avenue – 7:30 p.m.

Love,

Karen (plus my cats, Smokey and Cookie)

PS Last time I sent out a newsletter, my Ivy screenwriters were hurt because I didn’t mention them. So I am mentioning them now. Hi Stan! Hi Jim! Miss ya. Love ya. Let’s do lunch. [This is how people talk in Hollywood.]

I just discovered that someone blogged about me! It was my friend, Drayton Bird, whom you may recall was the villain in The Ivy Chronicles. Well, he wasn’t, but I named the villain after him because I’ve always believed his name was book-worthy. Anyway, I feel so famous so I thought I’d share the blog with you. If you want to check it out, he’s at Drayton-bird-droppings.blogspot.com

“Author doesn’t eat vegetables and is very short. Connections? You decide”

That quirky little line was written by an old friend, author Karen Quinn.

I used to work with – for – her when I did executive training for American Express. who canned me eventually because I was too outspoken. (Dull and safe does better in large organisations).

Anyhow, she was terrific marketer, a very loveable person and probably too bright to stay in the Amex maw forever. So one day she came to her senses and left to write a book, called The Ivy Chronicles, which was a best seller.

It’s all about parents fighting to get their kids into the best schools. Very quick with the quips.

Guess what the villain’s name is? Drayton Bird! (She asked me first).

Then she wrote another, and now she’s got yet another out – Wife in the Fast Lane

Check her out if you like a laugh.

April 18, 2008

Hi everyone,

Let me get the super important stuff out of the way:

Please get your calendars now and ink in the date. If you’re going to be in New York or Denver in June, come see me read from Holly Would Dream. American Idol won’t be on that night. I made sure of it.

New York – June 5
Barnes and Noble – 6th Avenue at 8th Street – 7:30 p.m.

Denver – June 17
Tattered Cover – Colfax Avenue – 7:00 p.m.

If you’d like, you can pre-order the book right now from Amazon.com or Barnesandnoble.com. Feel free to order several. They’re really cheap and make the great gifts. Don’t worry, we’ll wait for you.

Now that my soft-sell is over, welcome to my nightmare. I am writing to you from the Delta skipper plane terminal in Orlando. We are in the midst of a deluge of biblical proportion. An enormous black cloud has settled over the airport, sending down crackling lightening bolts and loud thunder booms. My flight has been delayed indefinitely. Apparently the plane I’m to take is circling because it’s too dangerous to land. It’s one of those baby jets that I always swear I will never fly in bad weather. And yet, here I am waiting.

Sitting next to me is the pilot who is supposed to fly my plane. Captain Tickle is his name (according to his badge). Captain Tickle is fast asleep and snoring lightly. Am I worried? You bet I am.

Mark and I just spent a week in Orlando. It was a work boondoggle where I got to come along as “the wife.” You’ll never guess what I discovered on my visit. There’s a brand new activity in Orlando, one that is giving the theme parks a real run for their money. What is it, you ask? Foreclosure bus tours! That’s right. In a wacky pink bus (because pink spells fun), they drive you past homes that last sold for a half a million bucks that can be yours for…well, no offer is too small! A bank officer sits at the front of the bus providing commentary about each home. You can even put them on your American Express cards, which have no spending limit. If you ever wanted to live near Disneyworld, now’s your chance.

Okay, now Captain Tickle is drooling (just a little spittle, but still). What do I do? I do not know the etiquette here.

But I digress. We discovered a wonderful bar in Orlando called Vines. It’s in a strip mall near a restaurant called Jeffrey’s (in case you want to go there). When we first walked in, it looked as if Sunset Manor had dropped off its house band. The average age of the musicians was eighty. The bass player wore those thick glasses you have to wear when you have cataracts, the singer/tambourine player was riding an electric wheelchair, and another player fell asleep during a drum solo (not his). Bernie Lee, the vocalist, is pictured above. Despite their advanced years, these guys were fabulous musicians, even the catatonic drummer. The wheelchair guy was brilliantly channeling Louis Armstrong. I’m totally going to write them into in my next book. Apparently, this is the house band so if you come to Orlando, check it out along with one of those foreclosure bus tours. But I suggest you see the band sooner rather than later.

My airplane has just pulled into the gate. Yikes! You should see the black clouds. I’m not sure this is safe. I would discuss my concerns with Captain Tickle, only he’s making those sleep apnea snorts right now. He just woke up. He seems upset, confused. I have to confess that I am not confident about putting my life in the hands of Captain Tickle. If you are reading this newsletter, you will know I survived. Thanks be to God! (as Sonja, my old Russian manicurist/bikini groomer, used to say before she burned down the health club where she worked by leaving the wax on overnight).

Oh guess what? I attended my first writing class ever last weekend. It was Robert McKee’s Story conference. You might know him from the movie Adaptation. Ronnie Cox portrayed him in that film. The guy is a crusty old professor type with gray caterpillar eyebrows that cast long shadows on face. The class was quite intense – three twelve-hour days of story structure. Hopefully my stories will feel more structured to you in the future. At least he amused us with little ditties like, “I’m using a lot of profanity because I like to. If you don’t like it, there’s the fucking door.”

Epilogue: I did make it out of Orlando. Flying in that skipper plane was like being tossed around in a tiny raft in the North Sea. I was very relieved to land when, about an hour later, that same deluge from Orlando let loose from the Miami sky. Now I’m back in New York.

This week, my mother and mother-in-law came in to see Schuyler play Kim in Bye Bye Birdie. She was fantabulous in the role! We took the subway to the performance. At 14th Street, I told the grandmothers that we were changing to the express line. So, when the train stopped, we rushed out, but when I looked around, only my mother was on the platform. My mother-in-law was still in the local car and the door was closing. Her eyes were like saucers and she pounded on the glass in desperation (I’m exaggerating a bit but only because I know she’s reading this). Mom and I mouthed the station where we wanted her to get off right before the subway whisked her away. I felt awful! What do you tell your husband after you lose his mother in the NYC subway system? He would have been really mad, let me tell you! Thanks be to God, she got off at the right stop and we were happily reunited. But it was a close call.

Okay friends, don’t forget, if you haven’t already, get out your calendars now and INK in the date. If you’re going to be in New York or Denver in June, please come see me read from Holly Would Dream. It’ll be so much fun!

New York – June 5
Barnes and Noble – 6th Avenue at 8th Street – 7:30 p.m.

Denver – June 17
Tattered Cover – Colfax Avenue – 7:00 p.m.

I promise not to curse like Robert McKee, nor will I not drool like Captain Tickle. I will, however, make you laugh. I really, really, really hope you’ll come (I only use three reallys when I really, really, really mean it).

Love,

Karen (plus my cats, Smokey and Cookie. I thought you’d enjoy seeing them)